March 15, 2007

Who knows?

"If you want your laundry done right, I used to work at Abercrombie, so I'm a preeeeeeetty good folder."

- Andy, The Office, "Traveling Salesman"

Sometimes my life at the Brand feels like it happened to a different person, as if perhaps it was just a movie I saw once, a long time ago. I've been in Atlanta for five years now, which is the longest I've lived anywhere since high school, but yet it feels like I just got here; like I've been here for a minute.

That first year - when I was waiting tables and working six days a week - was hard, undoubtedly. Despite the fact that I was on my feet every day walking miles and miles across a restaurant's hardwood floor, I still managed to gain about 30 pounds. (Ranch dressing is the devil's nectar, y'all, and I've spent the past four years trying to work off its effects!) But it was honest work and I made friends there and I made the work work.

This summer, after Michael was born, I could barely stand living here. I felt far away and disconnected from my family and I didn't know how I would be able to stand it for much longer. But then something happened. I got into a good groove at work and my friend group at church grew exponentially. I finally found a small group that feels like family and it was as if God was blessing my life in Atlanta beyond measure; blessing the decision I made to listen to Him in the quiet and make the leap to move here without a net.

It's hard to know, sometimes, the right thing to do. Where you're being led; where you're being told where to go. As happy and as settled I am here, maybe this isn't where I'm supposed to spend the rest of my life. There is my family still 500 miles away, after all. As much as I love Buckhead Church, there are other churches. As much as I love Atlanta, there are other cities. As much as I love my friends, there are other people whose lives perhaps are meant to intersect with mine.

I try to listen. I try to pay attention to the signs and quiet moments. But sometimes you still just have to leap.

"And who knows but that you were created for such a time as this?"
Esther 4:14

Posted by hannah at 08:42 PM